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December 14, 2007
I am turning into an old person
In the early/mid '90s, my generation fought for freedom from old lady blue jeans, those '80s jeans which came up over our belly buttons, and we won. But the next generation has taken the fight too far. Now it is hard to find jeans that come up over the pelvic bone, and if they don't top my hips how am I supposed to keep them from falling off?
I knew that the ultra-low-rise jeans posed a problem for women like me, women who want to wear jeans that were once called low-rise. Today I learned that even low-rise jeans are getting lower. After learning that American Eagle might have at least one denim model made of 100 percent cotton (no lycra for me!), I went shopping there on my lunch break. I was wearing a four-year-old pair of jeans from the same store, "low rise" on the label. I grabbed a pair of low -- not ultra-low -- rise jeans from the rack. The old low-rise jeans come up to about two inches below my belly button. The new model comes up to about four inches below my belly button. I tried on a pair of ultra-low rise jeans next. To wear them out of the fitting room would have violated public decency laws.
And don't even get me started on stretch denim. If I wanted my jeans to be as big as my belly, I would buy jeans that fit. If I am going to buy a pair of pants two sizes too small, it's because I want to be squeezed in tight and minimized in girth. Perhaps the ever-lower rise of denim is what has necessitated lycra in the cotton, a loosening of pants to lessen the inevitable "muffin top" effect. Too much flesh spills over the waist of ultra-low jeans that don't stretch.
Why can't I just get medium-low-rise 100 percent cotton stretch-free blue jeans, like we had when I was a teenager? The world is changing, and I feel compelled to complain.
Posted by Courtney_Sherwood at December 14, 2007 08:02 PM
Comments
I read this out loud to Ginny and she was like "hell yes."
Posted by: underwhelm at December 14, 2007 08:42 PM
Episode two: I actually bought a pair of non-stretch low-rise jeans, and wore them for a few hours after work. But I couldn't get comfortable. Because the front was so low, but didn't contain lycra, the jeans created a special little tummy shelf that felt funny and looked even stranger. Good thing I kept the receipt.
Posted by: Courtney at December 14, 2007 11:11 PM
Your revelation about microwave eggs intrigues me. Happy December, Courtney Sherwood.
Posted by: erin rovito at December 15, 2007 12:51 AM
Hi Erin! You must be in college now, or close, right? Happy December to you, too.
Posted by: Courtney at December 15, 2007 12:21 PM